Sunday, February 5
(Sebastian's school, under snow...)
After fretting and fretting over what I was going to do with myself for this upcoming year off, I had an epiphany. Studying Japanese will be my core focus. Everything else I do now has less pressure and can be done for pleasure, something I rarely allow for myself. Being proficient in Japanese will open doors for us here and I will wait until after I have achieved that state to worry about what lies beyond. This may seem like an obvious answer yet for me and my little anxious mind, it is hard to have such clarity about my direction. I want to do everything and have a hard time accepting the limitations of time. By studying a language that I love, I hope that I will develop a better respect for time including those limitations I fight against all the time (to no avail).
So now, at 5:30 on a Sunday morning, I am walking away from the computer where I was looking up things that happened in my dreams and going to the kitchen table, where a stack of books awaits me. First, I need to make a cup of tea (お茶).
Have a lovely weekend!